This is the follow up to my previous post. I asked this question, “What if I told you that there are solid churches in various parts of this country that are teeming with young godly families?” These posts are borne out of my observations of biblical churches that have somehow attracted, and kept, young families without compromising biblical doctrine and practice. It’s time we deal with the second and third observations.
Observation #2: They Have Established an Intentional Culture
Ok, I get it. Hearing that, you are instantly prone to defense mode against any semblance of seeker-sensitive Christianity. The seeker-sensitive movement did a lot of damage, but it also left a lot of valuable lessons. This is something they got right. This is something solid, biblical churches should aim for as well. That is, if we want to have any life or energy in our churches. We don’t bare the nickname “the frozen chosen” without reason.
Culture is a big deal. It is what takes a random group of individuals and turns them into a united family pursuing one goal together. If you have it, it’s beautiful. If you don’t, all manner of chaos is likely. As Christians, we already have one huge advantage in our culture building. We are all united in Christ. We share the same Savior and we are indwelt by the same Holy Spirit. That unites us as a global people. However, the local church takes a little more. For a local church, the question must be answered as to how that reality will be lived out on a daily basis in the midst of the congregation and to the world around it. Answer that question and you will know what kind of culture you want to see in the church.
The leadership of these churches have answered the culture question. They have then answered the question of how. Culture does not just happen. It is built. It is intentional. It is cultivated (which is actually the concept that the term “culture” comes from). When I walk into a church, I can pretty quickly sense whether a church has a genuine culture or not. If it does not, chaos is inevitable.
Young people want to be a part of something. They want to raise their children in a meaningful culture. They want to sense that what they are participating in matters. If it feels to them like nothing more than a regularly scheduled religious exercise, they will be out quicker than they came in. Is it any wonder that young families are gravitating to the churches that have intentionally built (i.e. cultivated) their culture?
Observation #3: They Have Established an Intentional Environment
This observation follows the last. If you know what kind of things you want to mark your church’s culture, you can adjust the environment in your church to facilitate it. I am a Millennial (I think) father of four, so I have personal experience here. Love it or hate it, the condition and layout of a church’s facility tells me all I want to know about the prospects of my family’s future involvement there. If I walk in to drop off my child at the Sunday School class and I notice the mold spots in the ceiling and the old, mildewed carpet that was installed in the 1950s, my family will politely leave after the service and never look back. That Sunday School room told me everything about the culture of the church. Renovate that mess!
One church that did this very well was near to my hometown growing up. They were big on fellowship and community. It was intentionally part of their culture. When they had the opportunity to build a new building, they built that culture into the structure itself. The doors into the sanctuary were inside the building. You had to go through the main room in order to get to it. No other way. The main room was set up to invite fellowship. When you entered that room, you just wanted to sit on one of the couches and hang out. Yes, they had coffee (I can hear the gasping of the reformed elite. Their disapproving glares are piercing to the soul). The layout of the building almost forced fellowship to happen in an organic way just by trying to get in and out of the sanctuary.
If your otherwise biblical church is struggling to attract and retain young families, maybe these are some of the hard questions you should ask. Do we have a culture? Is it intentional? What have we done to define and cultivate it in recent years? Do we even know who we are as a church body? What does our environment communicate to young families entering the building? How does it (or doesn’t it) foster the culture we are trying to build?